Sunday, March 16, 2008

Tit for Tat

Here's a juicy little tidbit fresh off the Saipan rumor mill. You know that Japanese businessman/tour operator who was arrested for raping a tourist last week...well apparently the poor sap is innocent and this is just the latest battle in a long running feud between this fella and some other Japanese businessman/real estate tycoon who was, shall we say, a tad miffed, over a certain business deal.

Apparently, and this is mostly hearsay, but it's gotta be at least somewhat true cuz hey, you just can't make this stuff up, but apparently to tell the whole story you gotta back the truck up to about a year ago when Japanese real estate tycoon dude showed up on Saipan and employed the services of Japanese tour operator dude (since you don’t tell names and tales too we’ll just identify them as thus for now).

Evidently real estate tycoon dude made a reservation with tour agency dude for a high dollar straight pimpin penthouse crib at the Nikko for something like six months. Well as you can imagine when it came time for the bill it was somewhere in the 100’s of thousands of dollars…but apparently real estate tycoon dude doesn’t have as good an imagination as my loyal readers so he was somewhat peeved at having run up such an astronomical tab and felt he had been overcharged.

So, doing what any respectable 44-year-old Japanese businessman/real estate tycoon dude would do…he and his supposedly yakuza connected Japanese business partner dude took tour operator dude out to a strip club to drink excessively, touch boobies and, oh yeah, of course, talk business.

Well after a while of this they apparently decided that a strip club was not a very conducive environment for discussing serious business and elected to head to Suicide Cliff, a spot we would all agree is much better suited for such transactions. (???) Upon arrival, surprise, surprise, they proceeded to beat the stink out of tour operator dude with a baseball bat, demanding that he either A.) pay them $250,000 or B.) jump off the cliff (ahh…decisions, decisions).

Lucky for tour operator dude however, a randy Korean tour operator dude and his “friend” decided to show up at the cliffs for some 3am “stargazing” (yeah right, I think you can read between the lines there) and scared off the real estate tycoon and yakuza dude. They graciously took the tour operator to the hospital where a CHC nurse informed police of the beating.

Needless to say, business tycoon guy was arrested and while the criminal charges seem like they won’t really amount to much…enter opportunistic bloodsucking lawyer who informs our now black and blue tour operator that he can sue real estate tycoon for some of those big tycoon dollars, or yen…as the case may be. And tour operator dude who apparently doesn’t know when to take a hint and just leave things be decides that this is a great idea and proceeds with civil litigation.

Well obviously no rich businessman is going to take an assault on his money laying down…but he knew someone who would…enter opportunistic slut-for-hire. This is where it really gets salacious…

According to rumor, Japanese real estate tycoon dude hired a woman and her friend to come here from Japan as innocent tourists through the tour company of, who else, but our hapless, though somewhat dim-witted Japanese tour operator dude. This woman and her friend then proceeded to have a big night out on the town with Mr. Gullible…er I mean…tour operator dude and conspired to seduce him (a tough job I’m sure) and lead him to “know” her in a Biblical sense of the word like as Adam knew Eve.

Sooo…you can imagine our dense tour operators surprise when he was arrested a while later on charges of sexual assault and rape. In the words of the immortal Homer Simpson…Doh!

So here’s how things stand as of press time for this blog…Japanese tour operator dude had finally gotten bail reduced from $60,000 to $6,000 and after a few days of sitting in the pokey was finally able to get out, whilst real estate tycoon dude waits for his day in court on both the criminal and civil charges for the beating.

What happens next in this uniquely Saipan epic is anyone’s guess…

Ah-ha Moment of the Day:

Ok now go back and read the title of this post.

8 comments:

sandeepjr said...

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thats where i post some of my stuff. hope the flight back was not too hard on ya.

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Cross said...

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lil_hammerhead said...

You wouldn't believe this kind of stuff, if it really didn't happen. The potential goofy sub-plot of a cheesy crime novel.

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