Showing posts with label whatever. Show all posts
Showing posts with label whatever. Show all posts

Thursday, August 9, 2007

"Whatever"

WELL...this is it...I have finally succumbed to the peer pressure. That's right, I have capitulated to the crowd and started a blog. Being the great conformist that I am I knew it was only a matter of time and after Lewie emailed me showing off his latest endeavor, I knew it was time. Yep ladies and gentlemen the blog wave has finally arrived on Saipan and it has come as a tsunami. (the only kind it seems we'll ever have, despite the constant alarms)

Mind you, it has been an agonizing and soul searching feat as I struggled with what exactly I would write about and what shape this diatribe would take. I mean, I don't have the strange fascination with underwater snail orgies that Harry and Greg so enjoy. I don't have that cute ESL twist on the English language that my wife Hozumi does. I'm not as opinionated as Bateman, I don't have the sex appeal of Brad, nor do I have near the motivation and general go-getemness of Angelo. I'm not as philosophical as EJ nor do I much care for swimming or biking, and unlike Lewie, the only way I'm going to run is if something is chasing me. I do however posses a phenomenally receding hairline, but alas, it would seem even the outspoken Mr. Turbitt has me browbeaten there.

So, I concluded, why be tied down to any one hobby or talent (since I lack both) why not simply write about everything, and anything...in a word "Whatever".

"Whatever" - it's not just a word, it's an entire vocabulary in three syllables! Express contempt! Drip with irony! Shatter your opponent's sense of self-worth! Leave clueless Baby Boomers dumbfounded! Let it lead to anything! And best of all, it's fat free!

So be sure and return regularly to read about "Whatever" cuz you just never know what random strange aberrant indiscriminate thought might spring forth from my cranium. I suppose my blog could be summed up by that mentally challenged genius Forrest Gump when he said and I quote "Life is like a date with Madonna...you never know what yer gonna get."...or something like that...